Parenting A Child With ADHD

A Mum's Eye View of Parenting a Child with ADHD

ADHD Parenting Tips | I Can’t Cope With My ADHD Child

March 24, 2017 By: admin2 Comments

ADHD Parenting Tips | I Can’t Cope With My ADHD Child – Part 1

Parenting is never easy  – Not for ANY parent (even those parents who seem from the outside like they’re doing everything perfectly and coping really well – yes – even they have problems sometimes!!)!!

 

There are always challenges and we are always learning new things as we go along. Because children don’t come with an instruction manual however much we wish they did!!

 

But when you are parenting a child with ADHD you’re going to need some ADHD parenting tips because there are so many times when you say (or scream) to yourself “I can’t cope with my ADHD child!”

 

It’s a totally different kettle of fish to parenting a non ADHD child!

 

It is totally draining, emotionally and physically.  

 

There are many times when you just wish you could run away and hide.

 

But of course you don’t…

 

…because you know your child needs you…

 

…and you love them so much…

 

…that however frustrated, crazy, angry, disappointed, miserable, run down,drained or exhausted you get because of the daily struggles…

 

…you’re ALWAYS going to do your best for them…

 

…NO MATTER WHAT!!!

 

BUT…

 

And it’s a BIG BUT….

 

YOU ALSO NEED TO LOOK AFTER YOURSELF!!

 

Because if you don’t – Who will be there to help your child?

 

As any Air Hostess will tell you you need to put on your own oxygen mask BEFORE you can help others – EVEN YOUR CHILDREN!!

 

Because if YOU run out of oxygen before you finish helping your child you’re no good to them or to anyone else!

 

So you need to gather together some ADHD Parenting tips that work for you and your ADHD child so that you have something to fall back on when you get to that stage where you’re yelling inside your head “I can’t cope with my ADHD child“.

 

And hopefully that is where I can help.

 

ADHD Parenting Tips | I Can’t Cope With My ADHD Child – Parent Survival Video

 

 

I hope todays video has made you realise just how important it is to look after yourself. 

 

Don’t feel guilty for needing some time or space for yourself (yes I know we all feel guilty and selfish for wanting some “me time”) because you’re doing it for your child in the long run. 

 

Remember if you end up ill you can’t help them anyway – better they cope without you for 10 minutes a day than for days on end if you have to go to hospital to recover!

 

I’ll be here for you with more ADHD Parenting Tips in future posts and hopefully I can help you get to the point where you’re hardly ever screaming to yourself “I can’t cope with my ADHD child“!

 

If you got some value from this post please comment below.

 

For more videos please click to visit my Parenting A Child With ADHD Facebook page here.

 

Get answers to all your ADHD Parenting questions and more ADHD Parenting Tips by joining the private facebook Parenting a Child with ADHD support group here.

 

Sending Lots of Love and Hugs because if you’re parenting a child with ADHD you probably need them…

 

Mrs P ( But you can call me Sandra)

x x x 

Sandra Paget February 2017

 

 

 

Parenting a Child with ADHD | Does My Child Have ADHD? Part 1

April 4, 2016 By: admincomment

Parenting a Child with ADHD | Does My Child Have ADHD? –  Should I have Spotted it?

 

As Marissa was my first daughter I had no experience of what a “normal” child was like (if there ever is such a thing as normal!!) but now with hindsight and the benefit of things I’ve learned along the way  and the differences In my second daughter I can see that from the very beginning she was a little different.

 

Most of the differences were very small and subtle and each taken individually probably mean nothing at all but as with so many things when you put them all together and the picture grows they start to tell a different story.

 

And you think to yourself – should I have spotted it sooner?

 

Because I’m ashamed to say that it wasn’t until Marissa was at the point (aged 8) of wanting to die by falling out of an upstairs window that things came to a head….and the Dr referred us to the children’s mental health services.

 

You can watch a quick video on this here or click on the picture below.

 

Parenting a Child with ADHD, Does my child have ADHD

 

I was heartbroken and felt like a failure as a parent, and being a good parent was all I’d ever really wanted to be.

 

So you can imagine how that made me feel!!

 

But then, I didn’t know anything about ADHD back then let alone parenting a child with ADHD!!

 

Parenting a Child with ADHD | Does My Child Have ADHD?  -What are the Signs of ADHD?

 

Couple that with having no previous child to compare Marissa with.

 

So I guess I had no reason to suspect that all these minor signs were anything other than normal.

 

So what were these signs that I was parenting a child with ADHD that popped up over the years?

 

Let’s have a think…

 

One of the first signs was her sleep problems.

 Parenting a Child with ADHD, Does my Child have ADHD

She was never a good sleeper and I know many children suffer from this when babies but to this day she still has sleep problems now aged 11.

 

I remember the very first night she was born and I half-slept all night with my arm in her cot and her tiny hand was curled around my forefinger it clenching me tight the whole night through….a memory I’ll never forget and that gives me goose bumps from a heart bursting with love even as I type this now.

 

Parenting a Child with ADHD | Does My Child Have ADHD? – What Helped?

 

I read book after book trying all sorts of routines suggested by the experts….

 

Sleep deprivation is a killer!!!

 

Especially as, at 39, I was no spring chicken to have my first newborn!!

 

We tried everything when she was a baby but the 4 hourly sleep/feed pattern was never any more than 3 hours and that was good for her.

 Parenting a Child with ADHD, Does my Child have ADHD

Much as I didn’t like them, I even tried a dummy or soother as they are now called.

 

I was desperate to get her to sleep so I was willing to try ANYTHING!!!

 

But even if I help it there for a bit she’d just spit it out.

 

And she didn’t just gently push it out – I could feel her forcing it out pushing hard against me as I tried to gently but firmly hold it in place!!!

 

Finally I came upon one book by Tracey Hodge, the Baby Whisperer, which recommended the E-A-S-Y method of setting up a routine

– but it was FAR FROM EASY!!

 

It Stood For:-

 

Eat – ie feed your baby

Activity – play with your baby

Sleep – Put your baby up for a nap

You – “You time” (What’s THAT??) You have time to yourself whilst your baby sleeps.

 

 

I have to say that although it was the best of the many things I tried there certainly wasn’t an awful lot of the “You time”!!

Parenting a Child with ADHD - Secrets of the Baby Whisperer

Click Here to Get this Brilliant Book

The book by Tracey Hogg the baby whisperer had tons of tips in and you can find it here….but when you’re parenting a child with ADHD you’ll realise that ADHD babies don’t sleep well whatever you try.

 

As a last resort I spent one desperate night sitting with my head in my hands sobbing away as I listened to my beautiful baby sobbing away upstairs and hard as it was I made myself allow her to cry herself to sleep.

 

She did learn to suck her thumb after that so it did help a bit with the sleeping but it was a really tough night and it didn’t end there.

 

 

As she’s grown older we’ve had to try all sorts to help her sleep…..

 

Lavender on the pillows – no good the smell was “too strong” for her.

 

Relaxation Techniques – no good – can’t concentrate on them/gets distracted.

 

White Noise – we tried an un-tuned radio for the crackling sound and ended up settling with the fan – we still have a fan on at night in her room even in the coldest weather.

 Parenting a Child with ADHD, Does my child have ADHD - Lavender

Relaxing Music – does help but we still have to have it on most nights even now.

 

Reading before sleep – either she can’t concentrate or gets so engrossed that she forgets the time and stays awake too long…

 

Binaural rhythm music to help her brain get into the sleep brainwave helps but she got bored of using that too.

 

Well the sleep problems were just the first thing.

 

I’ll go into some of the others in my next post as the demands of parenting a child with ADHD are calling me again and time has run out for now….

 

Speak soon, and if you have any questions or need any help then reach out to me on my facebook page here (Please like my page if these posts resonate with you) or by private message to my personal page here (best to friend request me first or it might get filtered).

 

You can also click here to send me a direct email.

 

Signing off for now but please share your thoughts below – I promise to respond to all comments.

 

Please also share this post with anyone you think it may help.

 

Sending Love and Hugs to you all

 

Mrs P (Sandra)
 x x x 
http://ParentingachildwithADHD.com

 

If you missed my last post you can click here to find it.

Parenting a Child with ADHD | Surviving Parenting a Child with ADHD

March 5, 2016 By: admin8 Comments

Me, Sabrina, Marissa & Graham

Parenting a Child with ADHD | Surviving Parenting a Child with ADHD – Welcome

 

Hi there! It’s Mrs P here – but you can call me Sandra. I’ve never been much of a one for formality!! And this is my family. Graham, Marissa (the big one with ADHD) & Sabrina.

 

Welcome to my blog.

 

I suspect you may have landed here as you are looking for answers about parenting a child with ADHD?

 

Here in this blog I aim to share my daily life as a mother parenting a child with ADHD in the hope of helping others coping with the same struggles to know that they are not alone.

 

I aim to share the struggles, the feelings, the joys, the disappointments, the pain, the challenges, the triumphs, the frustrations, the heartache, the funny side and the fight to support and help my daughter.

 

I also want to bring awareness about the effects it has on the whole family as well because it does affect everyone…

 

….not just the mother and the child concerned.

 

This is a Mother’s First Hand Account.

 

I hope you’ll enjoy reading….

 

 

Parenting a Child with ADHD | Surviving Parenting a Child with ADHD – The Beginning

 

Looking back to when I was 12 years old, I used to spend as much time as possible in my neighbour’s house playing with her small babies and babysitting them whenever I could.

 

I wished for the day I could become a Mum myself.

 

I never really knew what I wanted to do for a job when I grew up but I definitely had a dream of becoming a mum and living happily ever after.

 

Little did I know how difficult it would be when it finally happened at the age of 39….

 

…but then I didn’t realise back then that I’d be parenting a child with ADHD.

 

And even as I hear myself saying that it’s been difficult, I am filled full of guilt at feeling that way because it seems ungrateful….

 

Being a parent is a miraculous gift and I know only too well that some people are not lucky enough to be given the opportunity.

 

To those people who want to have children but for whatever reason can’t, my heart goes out to you.

 

Because however difficult parenting a child with ADHD has been for me I truly know how lucky I am to have my two gorgeous daughters and I am endlessly grateful that I have been blessed with the gift of sharing my life with them and my wonderful husband.

 

And that guilt I feel when I say that family life can be difficult when parenting a child with ADHD is part of the reason I’m writing this blog.

Parenting a Child With ADHD

I can’t be the only parent of a child with ADHD who sometimes struggles with the challenges it presents and the guilt of feeling it’s difficult….

 

….struggles to keep calm when there’s a deadline to meet to get to school or work on time and your child has taken 50 minutes to complete two five minute tasks when she even has a 10 minute timer to help her focus on the task and the timescale to do it in.

 

…struggles to find incentives to motivate your child to get things done when they can’t keep the rewards in mind long enough to focus on the goal.

 

…struggles when your child gets so upset and sobs her heart out because she’s really really been trying to concentrate but the more she tries the harder it is because her frontal lobes shut down when she tries too hard.

 

They say it helps to write things down to help you deal with your feelings.

 

So I thought writing this blog will help me do that and if JUST ONE OTHER PERSON who’s struggling with parenting a child with ADHD just like me were to stumble upon it whilst looking for help online one day, then hopefully they will know they’re not alone.

 

And if that person is you and you want to get in touch, please know that I am real and would love to chat.

 

Check out my facebook page here, or you can friend request and message me on my personal page here.

 

You can even email me here.

 

Sending you love and hugs ….because if you are that person you probably need them!!

 

 

Mrs P (Sandra)

Love & Hugs 

 x x x 

 

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